The Wash (2001) / Comedy

MPAA Rated: R for drug content, sexual references, and language
Running Time: 93 min.

Cast: Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg, George Wallace, DJ Pooh, Tom "Tiny" Lister
Director: DJ Pooh
Screenplay: DJ Pooh
Review published November 16, 2001

Sometimes I wonder why I waste my time sitting here writing reviews when out there movies are actually being made that require far less thought and time to make.  If there is anything more astonishing about The Wash than the fact that it exudes amateurishness on every level of the production, it's the fact that it actually managed to be released into theaters.  If The Wash took more than five days to write and produce, I would be amazed.  Watching the film, I thought I had accidentally put in the second disc of a DVD.  You know, the one with the deleted scenes.

Dr. Dre (Training Day) plays Sean, who has no job and mounting bills paid for by his drug dealing roommate Dee Loc (Snoop Dogg, Half Baked).  The roomie gets him a job at the car wash he works at, where he snatches the position of assistant manager, becoming Dee Loc's boss.  This causes a conflict with Sean, who wants to do a good job, yet his loafing roommate and the rest of the crew just don't seem to care.

I suppose one could easily and logically compare this to the other car wash film, Car Wash, yet this version is so inferior it makes me respect the original more since it actually created decent laughs even without a plot.  Like Car Wash, The Wash remains plot-less up until the very end, yet once this plot is introduced, what was a watchable bad movie plunges into depths of badness to sufficiently make the film painful in the end.  Dre and Snoop try to forge themselves into the new Cheech and Chong, and fittingly Tommy Chong does make a cameo appearance as Snoop's drug supplier.  However, what this film lacks that Car Wash as well as early Cheech and Chong had to make them appealing was inspiration. 

The Wash is a sloppily slapped together rap comedy that has a premise and nothing but filler scenes one after the other.  The script is devoid of anything fresh or funny, with vulgar words and situations in place of where jokes should be.  Forget the cars, the only objects that need washing are the cast members mouths...and viewers who may feel icky after viewing such anemic, sewage-spewing filmmaking.

Qwipster's rating:

2001 Vince Leo